We Sure Had Us Fooled. I
They sure had us fooled… I know this because when I was a little girl, all I really wanted to do was grow up. When I was in primary, I so badly wanted to be in the Junior High School and then when I got there, it seemed being in the Senior High School (SHS) was way cooler. In SHS, I couldn’t wait to get to the university so I would get to be picky about the classes I wanted to attend, wear whatever clothes I wanted and simply be a big girl, period. I saw my elder siblings and their friends and thought they were really cool.
I didn’t know that not stressing about what sort of shoe or dress I had to wear to school was bliss. I didn’t realize running around the house partially naked, having someone else worry about what I would eat or have mummy give me a bath was pure heaven. I simply wanted the autonomy my elder siblings had. I didn’t want to be the youngest one who had to run all the errands or be told what to do.
The funny part of this story is that every time I got to the stage I had dreamed about, I couldn’t wait to get to the next stage because it seemed more promising and fun. This was the case even when I was in the university (the place of adulthood). I couldn’t wait for graduation so I could get a job, earn my own money and buy whatever I so desired.
So I graduated and after the ‘5 minutes’ excitement, I joined the pool of unemployed graduates. Naturally, I wanted a job and I fantasized and worked to get one. During this time, my elder brother’s comment, about how good I had it as a student when I was still in school was beginning to ring as truth to me. I began to really appreciate my past student life – all I had to do was study, someone took care of all the expenses and I had no headache.
I’m working, and I better appreciate ‘those days’ now. I have my own money like I always wanted to but I understand now that it’s just not that simple. My own money is not entirely my own- forget the bills, just family and friend obligations are just the beginning. I wish I could turn back time. I wouldn’t want so much to grow up. I would be patient with the pace, play hard and quite frankly simply enjoy the moments.
It’s a wonder I thought growing up was all I wanted when I was a child and now I just want to be a baby again. They sure had us fooled.
what have you always wanted but realised you didn’t really want after you had gotten it?